Where Are You Now? Part II

"Where You Are Now"

PART II

November 25th, 2017

“If you end up in the same situation with different guys, you are the only common denominator.”

The type of emotions that come out of you when a relationship has gone astray can sometimes astound you. You truly realize how deep you are in a relationship when it ends. That’s when you see just how much you loved them and depended on the relationship and you find yourself trying to think of any way possible to get it back. You keep thinking that maybe there is something you can do to change the situation, or maybe if you keep playing it back, convince your mind to believe what you think actually happened.

Maybe there is something you can do to get you all back together to take away the pain? The pain of missing them, needing them and just wanting to hear their voice. You check your phone, email, and social media incessantly. Every time your phone rings, you hope it’s them. Every time you hear that text notification, you pray it's them. You go on social media accounts looking at every post and picture. Wondering if they are feeling just as miserable as you are in hopes they will realize they need you too. You find yourself looking at your old photos and reminiscing about your memories and conversations. That road trip you all took together for the first time. You all’s first valentine’s day together at your favorite restaurant. The gift they got you for Christmas that they saved up for all year. The first time you met their family and just knew you would fit right in.  Reminiscing back to when everything was okay and when they still made you smile. When they made you laugh. When they made you feel; loved. Holding on to every memory you have hoping it truly isn’t the end, but sadly; it is.

I’ve had these same feelings time after time in my life. I’ve been right where you are so many times, and each time, I found myself getting more and more upset after each heartache. But not only with the one who hurt me, but myself. I couldn’t understand why and how I got to that place again. Once again, hurt by a guy that I gave everything to. My love. My affection. My heart. My time. My everything. I remember asking myself so many questions and doubting myself in many areas. I didn’t understand how someone I loved so much could treat me like I was nothing. Just walk away as if we didn’t have a connection. As if I simply was an accessory in their life that could be easily replaced.

I had given so much to them and they meant so much to me, why didn’t they feel the same way? Why didn’t they need me just as much as I needed them? Though the questions were valid, the main thing I needed to pay attention to was the fact that I ended up in these situations several times. No matter who the guy was, the relationship seemed to take the same course as all the others. Instead of focusing on this truth, I found myself focusing on outside causes.  After a little while, you become numb and possibly even find yourself angry with God. You begin to blame forces outside of yourself as to why this keeps happening. All you wanted was love. All you wanted was to be cared for, and a man who was loyal and desired the same commitment as you. You start to think the world or God is against you and your desire. But, if you end up in the same situation with different guys, you are the only common denominator. Therefore, something in you needs to change.......Don't want to miss Part II? Click Here to subscribe to the "Rubies Blog"

Missed "Where Are You Now - Part I? Click Here to Read  

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The Rubies Blog is dedicated to those who are hoping to heal and move forward from past relationships. In conjunction with the Rubies Healing & Letting Go Session Guide, I will have a continuous post of writing excerpts as you go through the process. Each post will be a continuation of the writing as you move along your session guide. Moving on from a relationship can be hard for anyone. I hope here to provide support during this time and bring healing & comfort in your situation.

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